Two weeks after my second son began Nursery school at the age of 3, his teacher asked to speak with me when came to pick him up. She looked a little concerned as she asked “Does he speak?”. I laughed and responded “Yes, but not unless he has something to say.”
I’ve been in that place myself for the last few months. I have been very inwardly focused and a friend even called to ask if I was OK because I haven’t been very active on social media.
Initially, I was very busy with our move (we bought a new home). As I started to declutter my home and office in preparation for our move, it felt as though the paper monster had vomited all over my office. I felt completely overwhelmed!
Then I heard Spirit say: “Let it all go”.
Me: “All of it?”.
I felt instant panic then resistance (aka fear). My mind started racing.
Me: “What if I need it?”.
Spirit: “If you do, it will come back to you”.
I knew I was going to need help with this. Lol! I called up my trusted hypnotherapist and said: “I need to work on letting go and trusting on another level”.
Little did I know that was just preparing me for what was to come.
The “plan” was to take July off to move, then meet with my team in August and make a plan for what’s next. I let everything go for the month of July except my client calls.
For the first time in 3 1/2 years I did not send out my newsletter. It wasn’t part of the plan but in the midst of the busyness of moving I felt uninspired to write it. The last thing I wanted to do was do it because I “should”. I felt like I had nothing to say. (Oh, I could find plenty things to write about. But that’s not how I roll. I don’t believe in doing something for the “sake of doing it”. I’m all about being intentional, conscious and authentic.
As August approached, I was still feeling uninspired. I’ve always lived my life by following the inspiration but it was ‘time to get back into action’ and there was no inspiration in sight.
I was meditating and seeking guidance and direction and… Nothing. Zip. Nada. UGH!
It didn’t help that my mind kept screaming: “You have to DO something!”. “You have to take action or you’ll go out of business!” (sound familiar?) “You’re going to go broke and end up destitute, living on the streets!” (My beautiful creative mind is an expert at creating BIG, HAIRY LIES)
Thankfully, this is not my first rodeo (or my first journey through “the void”). I have stepped out in faith many times before in my life: Like when I sold my car to pay for a trip to China (not knowing how I would replace it when I returned home) Or when I closed my successful business, sent my boys to live with my ex-husband and moved to England.
So, I chose to remember what I’ve learned from walking this path before:
1. Even though I may not know when or how, I have ALWAYS made it out the other side of the void. Clarity eventually comes (and with it inspired action.)
2. I practiced being compassionate with the part of me that was feeling afraid. I also pulled out my bank statements and reminded my fearful self we were not in danger of being destitute) 🙂
3. The more I am able to relax into it, the faster I move through it. When there is something new that wants to be birthed and expressed we have to create space for this to happen.
4. It requires patience a willingness to trust. Yourself and The Universe/God. Other people will think you’re crazy. 🙂
5. It is a lot easier to relax into the process and not be derailed by doubt and fear if you have support. Surrounding yourself with people who understand and support you, and who have taken this journey themselves, makes it a lot easier to trust the process.
The most exciting aspect of a journey through ‘The Void’ is what you discover and who you become as you move through it. It is a journey of expansion with incredible rewards!
Can’t wait to share what is emerging now with you all. Stay tuned.