I was speaking with a client the other day about her long term goals for her business. When it came to the subject of her retirement, her whole energy froze.
She said, “Um, what retirement fund?”
I could feel her energy sinking fast as shame rose to the surface.
I told her: “Stop worrying about having a retirement fund.”
Angry now, she said “What do you mean stop worrying! At the rate I’m going I’ll be working until I’m 99!”
Here’s the thing—yes, you need to take practical steps to avoid working into your old age, but stressing yourself out about those steps and the fact that you haven’t done more by now?
That’s 100% optional.
Feeling peaceful about money – or anything else for that matter – is all about mindset. It’s choosing to look at things from a different perspective. A healing perspective.
It’s choosing to release the shame, guilt and anger. The regret and self recrimination for being where you are and not having accomplished more.
It’s accepting what is, so that you can actually make a new plan and move forward.
It’s learning to trust that, even if you lost all your money tomorrow, you’d have the internal fortitude to be able to handle it and take care of yourself.
A word of caution—harping on your past failures will stop you in business (and life) more than anything else.
You will make mistakes. Big ones (join the club!).
Choose to believe in yourself anyway.
Re-frame your past “failures”. What did they teach you? (This re-frame is a powerfully healing perspective!) Going from feeling like a failure to experiencing gratitude is life-affirming. It decreases stress and promotes health and well-being.
Try this exercise:
Close your eyes and think of something that you failed at. Now say out loud: “What’s awesome about that is…” then write down your answers.
Here are a few examples:
…I learned what to do next time.
…I ended up being able to help my friend when she was in that same situation.
…it made me realize what’s really important.
This exercise will help you shift your perspective and remember you can trust that everything serves. And when you trust, things have a way of working themselves out.
Even big things, like retirement funds.